Minneapolis/St. Paul April 1, 2001

Please copy this newsletter for your group.

Every year at this time I'm taken back to my first years in AA. This year the focus has been on ideas my sponsors and friend taught me or maybe I should say drummed into my head.

I'm sure it was frustrating for them as I would seem to "get it" and 10 minutes later be back at the old. Maybe that is why I remember some of it so well, they wouldn't give up, but patiently tell me again.

I'm soooo grateful they taught me that I was responsible for my sobriety no one else. If I wanted it, I had to go out and find the support, meetings, and fellowship that I needed. No one was going to hand it to me. That was the start for me to learn responsibility (which after living on the streets and then being in a relationship that was VERY codependent, I knew very little about). I was taught that when I needed help I had to ask, which absolutely terrified me. My thoughts on myself at that time were that I wasn't worth anyone bothering over. At the same time, I learned I was not responsible for anyone elses sobriety. That was between them and their Higher Power.

I was taught I needed to learn to socialize. I had not been in a social setting sober for over a decade! I would go to as many social functions as I could and hide in the furthest corner I could find. Gradually, and I mean over several years, I worked my way into the crowd and felt comfortable. During this process, I would sit and listen to others talk. Usually the talk was not "about" things - who was wearing what, the quality of movies, etc. - but people talked about how they felt, what was going on in their lives, and how they coped. (We were all so desperate for sobriety, we clung to each other a lot) Listening to them finally gave me the sense that I was not the only one that felt the way I did and that others who felt the same as me grew up with time.

The other bit I learned was that people were there for me when I needed them, which I can never repay. What I can do is attempt to repay that debt by doing service work. Although it sounds like doing any other volunteer work, it is not. I do it for selfish reasons. Every time I do service work it strengthens my sobriety.

I learned that pain was sometimes necessary, misery was optional. Along with that, I saw that I could find what I wanted at a meeting. If it was negativity, it was there. However, if I wanted recovery and a positive message, that was always there also.

Eventually, I learned that I was worth staying sober for all by myself. I didn't have to stay sober for someone else, or to keep a job, or for any outside reason. I was worth having the serenity and peace of mind that sobriety brings.

I also learned through a couple slips early in sobriety, that "Slippery people ought to stay out of slippery places!" Not only did staying out of bars keep me from drinking, but, being the drunk I was, I always became whoever the people around me wanted me to be. In the bars I would slip into my old ways of acting and thinking, even when I wasn't drinking. My growth was much faster once I started socializing with sober people in sober places.

I learned my spirituality was, just that, MINE. It didn't matter what anyone else had as their HP. I could have mine be whatever fit for me. That was a wonderful journey that continues today. I remember Patricia D. repeating over and over to me, "God doesn't give you anything you can't handle!" Sometimes it hurt like hell, but, it was true I could handle it (with the help of lots of others in sobriety).

I often wonder if I would have stayed sober if those people were not in my life. Probably yes, but I don't thing I would have had as much fun. JP often said, "you can act just as crazy as when you were drinking you'll just remember it the next day." Although the thought of remembering it the next day may have had some influence, we still acted pretty crazy and played a lot!

I extend my heartfelt gratitude to all the members of old squad 5 from the Founders' Club. You gave me my life, and it far surpasses what I ever hoped to find.

Plans for MinneSober, which is held in October, continue to progress. The AA Roundup sponsored by the GLBT community in the Twin Cities will, again, be at the Regal Hotel (which will be renamed in the near future) at 1313 Nicollet Mall, Mpls.

MinneSober's theme this year is "There Is A Solution".

This we owe to A.A.'s future:
To place our common welfare first;
To keep our fellowship united.
For on A.A. unity depend our lives,
And the lives of those to come.

Gopher State Roundup will be held at the Radisson South Hotel, May 25, 26, 27, 2001.

The theme this year is "Made A Decision". Registration for the weekend is a $10 donation.

Speakers will be May Ann X., AA, Corpus Christi, TX.; Heather M, AA, Dugald, MB, Canada; Rick J, Al-Anon, Toronto, On, Canada; Ted S, AA, Aberdeen, SD; June C, Al-anon, Bixby, OK; John A, AA, Dallas, TX; David L, AA, Holly Springs, NC; Sandy B, AA, Tampa, FL.

I have heard two of the speakers in the past and hearing them again will make the weekend worth it, let alone hearing the speakers new to me.

There are also several AA and Al-anon meetings, as well as videos of AA material. There is also lots of fellowship and food.

The weekend has always been a moving experiences, just being in the presence of that much sober energy (attendance runs about 6000).

GLBT in Recovery will have our same space for a Hospitality Room, #225. Stop in and visit us!

If you are interested in a little exercise and would like to try something new, how about joining us in learning rock climbing. Lessons are required, done indoors on a wall. This summer we will progress to the real thing.

If interested, contact Chris D. at 612-879-6484 for details.

At the March meeting, Gopher State Roundup's Hospitality Room was discussed. The cost of the space is about $300. We had hoped to make that from the Gratitude Dinner, but fell short. We would welcome donations from individuals or groups to help defray the expenses.

GLBT in Recovery obtained a voice mail box and an address to help with communication. The phone number is 612-822-4477 and the address is 3010 Hennepin Ave. So, #209, Mpls, MN 55408.

The Twin Cities GLBT Pride Festival was discussed. We decided to investigate the cost of having a contingent in the parade and a booth at the Festival. Literature from 12 step programs, newsletters, and meeting lists would be distributed. We will need help in organizing and staffing for the weekend, so please volunteer!

GLBT in Recovery is also assisting in the formation of a new GLBT Al-anon meeting. Plans currently are for a Wednesday night meeting. Several locations are being checked out. Watch for announcements of where and when! If you have any questions or wish to be contacted when plans are finalized, contact us at the above address, phone, or through the web site.

AA and Al-anon literature has been set up in the lobby of Pride Institute. This makes it available for the clients as well as visitors and family.

Noon
Sunday, April 1, 2001